Fantasy Baseblog #16

That's right, I wrote fourteen other fbb blogs, and they are so top secret, the government made me burn them. Wow, maybe I could get the Cos to sign off on something along those lines...

I had two drafts the other day, one an auction draft (my first ever) and the other a standard snake draft, with the third overall pick. Here's a little timeline of the goings-on Sunday afternoon:

First off, no drinking. Ahem-I'm trying to WIN something right now, and it ain't cornhole, so no drinkie. (Plus I was alone and had a softball game at 7, followed by 3 hours in the car to grab the girlie from DIA.) Six of one...

Anywhoo-

First pick at 3, Pujols. I can't grasp how he falls. I took him at #13 last year and rode him all the way to the finals. The man walks nearly twice as much as he K's. Far and away the most points you can put on your team, year after year (this statement all but guarantees Chris R. Young hits HIM in the face with a liner this year or some crap). I understand 1B is deep, but still. FYI, Wright went #1, Hanley #2. Hadn't seen Wright at 1 before, and it's a straight-up points league...dude's a total badass and 3B is thin. Still, I take Pujols at 1.

The rest of the draft went like this:

Sober. HA! For reals-

2-Nick Markakis-my kind of player, patient, young, could 'turn the corner' they say...whatever that means. Saying Nick Markakis could 'turn the corner' this year is like saying I could eat a whole baked ziti in one sitting. Duh! I just did that!

3-Longoria. These people are drafting pitchers because they are drunk. Merci bien, showernozzles.

I'm all giddy-these three dudes are Studley Dudleys, Pujols is the eldest at 28. Christ, Longo might hit 45 dingdongs this year if he stays healthy. With Wright off the board right away and ARod becoming baseball's Michael Jackson, I thought for sure I'd be looking at Jed Lowrie in the 19th or something, but there's Longoria, and there goes Vladdy two picks later. These guys are jackasses.

4-Mclouth is there, so's I takes him. Gonna get the papers. (2x)

5-Jake Peavy-in my mind, a little early still for a pitcher, but 'tevs, Jake and I are SOOO on again/off again so I take him. Down year puts him right back in my lineup, my dreams, my thoughts at red lights...For the record I do like having a top 10 pitcher on my team. I just think it makes the season more emotionally bearable. Last year I ran GOD DAMNED BRANDAN MORROW out in the finals and got a nice salty pork enema.

6-Alexi Ramirez-still half-chubbed about him from last year, NOT my prototypical player, a little too Alfonso Soriano for me, but he still plays 2nd, hits ropes, upside, yadda, White Sox, yadda-he'll be eligible at SS within the first couple of weeks to boot, so I'm all kinds of flexible in the middle. This is important, because later on, if someone goes down, I can plug the strongest MI, not just 2B or SS. Booyes. Good time to mention position flexibility. It's good. That's it.

7-Joe Votto. I know, I know...too early. DelgadoLD was there. Giambi, Carlos Pena, Conor Jackson-Jacksoff and James Lonely were also there. Votto is like Lance Berkman, who I love so much I can barely stand it. Again, dude walks, plays in a great park, young...blah blah. This is a 12 team league with CI and MI as well as 1B and Utility; deep.

The weight I give to fantasy consistency over many years has an inverse relationship to upside the further down the draft I go. So, Votto makes some sense at 7. Though, you should know that I can also convince myself that hamburgers are actually very healthy, it's the buns that cause 'fat sides'.

8-Pat the Bat Burrell-honestly, I have no love for the dude, but he's what the other geeks call 'an OPS hog'. OPS in the middle of a stacked lineup, DHing (he'll probably get 1B and OF eligibility along the way), means good things. Frankly I was bummed because Volquez and F. Liriano went JUST ahead of him, but, who's that on the turn?? Could it be? Yes! IT IS!!!

9-Daisuke Matsuzaka-I know, a little on the ugly side with his 5 2/3 innings of six-walk ball half the time. But he K's just about one guy per inning, and went 18-3 last year. That's right, 3 losses. And the Sox' bullpen is better, the defense is better, and you don't lose points for walks. Far as I'm concerned, if he goes 200 innings, he gets very strong Cy Young consideration.

But, no MI or SS that is actually eligible at SS for the beginning of the season...

Don't love Michael Young-but Peralta is there, and you know what? I'm taking him.

10-Jhonny Peralta. I'll take .275-25-100 in the 10th round at a weak position for SURE. EVERY TIME.

11-Josh Johnson-the NL's Francisco Liriano everyone always says. Numbers look very promising. He's healthy (post Tommy John surgery, but double 'tevs). Done.

12-Kelly Johnson-hey, that's the last time I take two Johnsons one after the other. HAY-O!

13-Wainwright-He's alleged to be nasty, but I know nothing. If Dave Duncan can get teens victories from Todd Wellemeyer, he should be able to do so from Wainwright. Oooh, I'm wicked tall, I'm Adam Wainwright!

14-Doumit-impatient but knocks ropes all over town.

15-Billy Butler (whom I've already dropped for Todd Helton)

16-Kevin Slowey-Low WHIP (it's like OPS for hitters!)

17-SPILBORGHS-get on and score. He and Helton (and Tulo, I like Tulo) are the only reasons why the Rockies remain mildly competitive despite having lost Holliday for some nice gentle scratches on the Rockies' ownership's arm (which is better than what they would have gotten at the trading deadline, or the upcoming post-season, I know).

18-Sean Marshall-Cubs 5 starter, lights-out spring...go get 'em

19-Jayson Werth-20-20 in limited role last year, dude rides pine for now, but he's playing every day in the most stacked lineup in baseball in a hitter's park.

20-Denard Span-he's like Spilborghs only he plays for a better team and runs more. Will end up leading off for the Twinnies, and depending on Mauer's health, the guy could push 120 runs.

So at about round 15, the frikin auction draft starts, and that, dear friends, is a story for another day...like tomorrow.

LATERZZZ-good luck! I know your draft is coming up soon!